Thursday, January 6, 2011

Steps and their Dad

Dear Best Friend,

My husband is supposed to see his kids on Wednesdays and every other weekend.  I guess you probably know that already but those details are important for what I'm going to say here.  So, yesterday he came home and said "I talked to stepdaughter today and she isn't coming because of homework."  I've heard that excuse a zillion times and said something similar to him, only a little nicer.  Then he said "And I also talked to stepson".  To which I replied "Great".  Now, he honestly seemed excited about it but I think it's pathetic that at this point in his life, his kids are such a royal pain in the butt, that just seeing them for 5 minutes is a major deal.  I want to be excited for him right back but I don't seem to be able to muster the enthusiasm he is looking for.

On the other hand, it's not like Wednesday night and every other weekend is very much time to be with their dad.  We live only a few miles away and being that they are teenagers they have plenty of access to their friends when they are here.  My husband is supportive of them going to the mall, the movies or whatever during the time they are here as well.  So in reality if they come over for a weekend it equals about 4 hours of actual time with him and some of that is spent eating meals.  That doesn't seem like too much to ask of them and yet they constantly come up with stupid excuses not to be here.

Again, I know he wants me to feel excited for him when they actually pay him a little bit of attention but what I feel is annoyance.  I hate to see him being stepped on.  They should appreciate all that he does for them.  Granted their mom, whom they think hangs the moon every night, buys them everything in the world and spoils them both rotten, sometimes I feel literally, but he's the one who pays an arm and a leg in child support so she can and he's also the one who saves money for their college.  My ex-husband hasn't paid child support in over 2 years, nor medical or anything else.  My kids even bring clothes to wear when they go over to his house because they don't have anything there that fits them anymore.  I see all that my husband does for the steps as an act of love because apparently not all men would do the same.  *sigh*

So, next time I'm going to try and be a bit more enthusiastic for my man.  He does deserve to have someone who is willing to give him more than the time of day.


Your Best Friend

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